Driving away from the wreck of the day, and it’s finally quiet in my head. Driving alone, finally on my way home to the comfort of my bed.

Things that upset me:

• Josh Duhamel is married to Fergie. Still.
• My local Target was all out of the eye shadow primer I use.
• I ran out of shampoo this morning.
• Miracle Whip has commercials on tv. I hate Miracle Whip. What the fuck is it??? Why?! Ew. Obviously, mayonnaise > miracle whip (why are they even comparable???).
• Creeper men keep hitting on me (including at my workplace!). No thank you!
• I went to the secretary of state today. Ugh.
• I really want a glass of water but I don’t want to get up off the couch and no one else is here to bring me any water.
• I can’t stop reading the most appalling blog ever, but for fear of offending the author or said blog, I will not link to it. It’s a train wreck and I’m consistently appalled by everything that is posted. I wish I could stop but I just cannot.
• I don’t have an audiobook to listen to on my way to work tomorrow because I just finished The Host (again).
• Scott Foley is on Grey’s Anatomy this season. While this fact does not upset me, the fact that Felicity ended after four seasons does. Even though Noel drove me up a fucking wall on Felicity, I have a deep, almost unhealthy love for that show.
• The library in my town would not issue me a library card today because my address actually resides within the next tiny county. It was explained to me that while I can use the system of libraries for which I tried to obtain a library card today, I have to have my card issued at the tiny piece of shit library I didn’t know existed in my county. Ugh. Why does everything have to be so difficult?
• My iPod will not sync with my iTunes. I don’t know what to do.
• Where the hell did Anna Nalick go? I loved her first album. And let’s just get real for a minute: who didn’t love “Breathe (2 AM)”?!?!?
• I can’t decide if I’m happy about the change I made in the format/design of my blog.

I’m just whiney right now.

Storybook endings, fairytales coming true… deep down inside we wanna believe they still do…!

One of my childhood memories includes our endless roadtrips to Florida for family vacations. At least once a year for a long time, we would drive down to Florida. This was before there were DVD players built into vehicles.

Mostly, I remember spending my time coloring in the backseat and ending up with some pretty jank coloring pages. I also remember singing along to Disney movie soundtracks at the top of my lungs. There were also some very long naps.

The other thing I remember is listening to Charlotte’s Web as a book on tape.

Dude. Why on earth did I ever stop listening to books on tape?!

All you have to do is sit there and listen to someone read to you.

It’s not even like that lame reading aloud we had to do in elementary school, you know, when you had to follow along. Or when you sounded like you had a stutter because reading out loud in front of people is hard. Or when you had to play that game where someone would be reading and then, like a dick, that someone would shout “popcorn!” and call your name and you were supposed to start reading but because you were busy picking at the chipped nail polish on your fingers or worried about the hole in the crotch of your leggings (because that’s all I wore in third grade, apparently! Thanks a whooooole lot, Mom!) you hadn’t been following along so you looked like an asshole.

What? I’m not bitter.

That is the best idea ever. Books on tape, that is. Not that shitty “popcorn” reading game.

I feel really good about this audiobook idea.

That’s why, when Harry Potter 7 came out and I hadn’t had time to read the book again before seeing the movie, I decided, OH EM GEE, I can totally just listen to it on CD!

Luckily, my mother is addicted to her ipod and happens to be a huuuuge fan of audiobooks. I never thought I’d be happy about that fact, but I think she might be on to something.

I listened to Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows on CD. First thing in the morning, as I was getting ready for work in the morning, I’d fire up whatever disk I was on and let Jim Dale’s voice fill my ears of Harry’s last quest for goodness to conquer evil.

Once I finished Harry Potter, I perused my library’s choices of audiobooks.  I decided upon Nineteen Minutes by Jodi Picoult. I seriously love her books. I never know what is going to happen. The ending is always a surprise, and that’s really awesome for books. I highly recommend pretty much anything by her. I read The Pact by her earlier this fall and that book was also excellent!

Finally, today, I started Goodnight Nobody by Jennifer Weiner. I enjoy her books as well. It may seem silly, but I actually was carrying the paperback version of this book around in my purse for probably a month. I hadn’t gotten past the first chapter. With the audiobook, I can listen while I get ready in the morning, I can take the book with me in the car on the way to work or when I’m just running around town. SO CONVENIENT!!

I’m seriously obsessed.

I’m never reading a real book ever again.

(Writing that kind of broke my heart. I take it back. I heart real books!)

Look at me, I’m beautiful and glamorous in rubber gloves, look how my tiara can be bent back to the shape it was, I can do the laundry and make dinner while I’m on the phone, look at me, I’m sexy as the devil as I mow the lawn!

In preparing for my trip to Philadelphia (alone, because my travel buddy bailed and had to stay home to work all weekend 😦 sad face for me) I had to do laundry.

I read, you know? I read other blogs. And I read books. And it’s all, like, girly stuff. Stuff about relationships and being a mom and cooking and shiz. You know, all stuff that doesn’t apply to me since I’m not in a relationship, I’m not a mom, I have no domestic skills and consider getting a box of triscuits out of the pantry cooking.  But don’t judge. It’s my life. I can read what I want. You’re not the boss of me.

Anyway.  Laundry. Even though I know that laundry is a universal thing, you know, something everyone has to contend with, a lot of what I read about laundry is women (usually older than me) bitching about it.

I’m not mad about it. Go ahead and bitch. More bitching I say.

In fact, if I had to do laundry that didn’t belong to me, I’d probably bitch about it too.

fancy, fancy machines! I love the buttons! They make little noises!

And if I had little mess-makers who are noisy and get dirty, like really dirty, I’d probably hate laundry too.

If I had to fold tiny things that are hard to fold, like tiny pants and onesies and bibs and stuff, like Nikki does or like other moms on the internet, I’d be irritated.

If I had a husband who was clumsy and spilled shit all over his shirt or if I had a significant other (whose laundry I was responsible for doing) who changed outfits four times a day (like I do sometimes), I would be irritated.

If that was the case, I would bitch about laundry. I would be annoyed with how it never ends.  I’d be irritated that things don’t fold easily and look nice when it’s all said and done. I would probably be overwhelmed by how often I move items between the washer and the dryer. I’d probably hate the makers of all of this laundry as I sorted it into different piles.

But, alas, it’s just me.

Just my laundry.

So when it comes time for me to do laundry (read: when I run out of underwear- and trust me, I have a lottttt so it takes a looong time before I muster up the courage to partake in a domestic skill), I don’t really have anyone to blame but myself.

And I really enjoy sorting my clothes into color piles. I can examine how big each of the piles are and be like Damn, how do I have that much clothing?!

And then I enjoy pushing the buttons on the washing machine. And measuring out the soapy stuff and sniffing the fabric softener.

I enjoy dedicating hours to laundry. Because while my clothes are being washed and dried, I can chill out and watch The West Wing or Grey’s Anatomy under the guise that I’m doing laundry, or I’m waiting for my clothes to dry. That I couldn’t possibly leave or run errands or something because God forbid my clothes would wrinkle. And you would be correct in assuming I don’t know how to operate an iron.

The best part, though, is folding. I really, really love folding my laundry. There’s something about seeing a perfectly folded shirt or matching up my socks. I love it.

I guess we can add laundry to the list of reasons why I’d make an excellent wife someday. (lolz) Sure, it may be the only thing right now on that list but that’s fine since I have no marriage proposals on the horizon. Also, I’m not really interested in being a domestic goddess. Carrie Bradshaw did just fine in life and she kept sweaters in her oven.

There’s a place downtown, where the freaks all come around, it’s a hole in the wall, it’s a dirty free for all…!

1.) I got Nicole Richie’s new book Priceless from the library. I’m so psyched to read it! I read her first book as more of a joke than anything else but I actually really liked it. haha I think this one’s gonna be good.

2.) Oh, speaking of books I’m reading, I finished The Pact by Jodi Picoult finally! It was SO GOOD!! I loved it! I didn’t know what was going to happen and it was like I couldn’t read fast enough. You should read it!

3.) I’m on a country music kick. I mean, I generally always enjoy country but lately it’s as if I just can’t get enough. I want it all the time.

4.) I had the following conversation today via text:

megan: bahahaa you live a kesha life fo shoooo

me: Hahaha sometimes you just gotta rub some dirt on it, roll in some glitter, brush your teeth with a bottle of jack, dance with no pants on, look like a pimp in a gold trans am, and like someone’s beard while having a slumber party in your basement. you just gotta.

5.) I think that was the best text message I’ve ever written. And I summed up Ke$ha real good.

6.) I miss having a dog.

7.) I still have no idea what I’m going to be for Halloween and it’s stressing me out. I keep getting really good suggestions but I just don’t know what to do!

8.) I watched My Generation on ABC and fell in love. It might be my favorite new show this season. I won’t give up watching Vampire Diaries to watch it when it’s actually on TV but I really, really love it. Like, I love everything about it. You should watch it! Go watch it online right now.

9.) I went to the parade of homes this weekend. I need to make a ton of money and marry really well so I can build a sweet house and have it be awesome and beautiful like the houses we saw this weekend.

10.) I had never heard of Pulaski Days before but I went to one of the places where festivities were taking place with one of my friends from work. It. Was. Outrageous. And Awesome. I have never seen anything like it.

Not sure why it's so pink but I sniped this pic on my crackberry

This is the website that explains what the celebration is all about.

I obviously made excellent life choices.

Anyway, there ya go! I hope you guys had a good weekend! I definitely did. 🙂

2 am and she calls me ’cause I’m still awake, “can you help me unravel my latest mistake?”

It is always been my strategy in school to procrastinate. My strategy in life is to avoid. They’re essentially the same.

Second semester of my senior year of college, I let procrastination (and probably my avoidance behavior) get to a new level. I remember hating myself then more than any other semester because of the procrastination. What I learned from it, however, is that there is nothing I can’t do if I set my mind to it.

Every week in my womens’ studies class we had a reflection paper due. This reflection paper required critical thinking and (obviously) reflection on whatever piece of reading we were to have completed over the course of the week. It was to prepare us for discussion. Every week, it meant I had a book to read and deep thoughts to think.

I tease my brother that he doesn’t know how to balance having a social life, school/homework and an actual job because his school is screwy and makes them work three months and then go back to school for three months, and then go back to work, so on and so forth. This means he never EVER balances all three. I balanced all three while I was in college.

You probably shouldn't bother me. I'm obviously very busy and important.

My point is that I tend to have excellent time management skills. I am a freak about how I spend my time, who gets to control the time I have, and what I do with said time. So, the fact I procrastinate has nothing to do with me having poor time management skills. It’s a choice. I choose to wait to the last minute to do everything.

It was my choice to wait to begin reading my women’s studies reading material until the night before it was due. For example, it was my choice to start reading Glass Castle (Sweet Jesus, I hated that book!) at 11:30 pm (after I got home from work, made some dino nuggets, changed into sweat pants, took my contacts out and set up my “reading nest” in the corner of my room). It was my choice to stay up until 4:30 am hating my life until I finished the most absurd book I’ve probably ever read. It was also my choice to then sit myself down at my desk and pen a reflection paper filled with critical thinking and deep, refelctive thoughts. Just like it was my choice to start writing my 15+ page final research paper twelve hours before it was due.

I think it’s clear I make really good choices.

And even now, when I should be writing a paper for my HR class, here I am, writing this little love letter about procrastination to all of you delightful readers of my blog.

I guess what I wanted to tell you was, there must be something wrong with me. Or maybe this tendency to procrastinate means something, maybe it tells you something about me. Maybe it means I live for the drama. I crave the excitement. I can’t function without the rush of adrenaline coursing through my veins. I need to hear that tiny voice in my head say, “Maybe you can’t do it! Maybe you suck, Katie! Maybe you won’t finish and you’ll fail the assignment and then have to drop out of school because you suck so much!” only so I can prove it wrong.

Either way, it’s how I work. And, really, the way I see it, it’s still pretty early that I can probably spit this paper out and be in bed by midnight watching Sleepless in Seattle.

Back to work I go.

What to write... what to write...?

Can you imagine no love, pride, deep fried chicken? Your best friend always stickin’ up for you, even when I know you’re wrong?

I have been thinking and thinking all day long about what I was gonna write about today. I just couldn’t think of anything. And now, I have too much material. I have too many thoughts that don’t go together at all. One, I am sure, is an over-share. One is a confession. And one is just totally random, like that time I announced at work, unprovoked, that I wished my cat would just die (and Casey got really upset).

I guess what it comes down to is that this is my blog, and I can do whatever I want here. So I’ll just over-share as much as I want. You shut your mouth; you like it, and you know it.

One: The Over-Share

Yesterday, I had been hanging out in the sweat-lodge that is my room here at Grandma’s. Except, lately, it hasn’t been too much of a sweat-lodge. The two fans I have going and standing over the vent in my room seems to be working out for me this week. Win. Anyway, I was doing something (I can’t even remember what it was anymore. HOW OLD AM I?!) and just minding my own business. Kickin’ it with me, myself, and I.

Then I decided, ohhh em gee I’m totally brillz!

Two words, my friends: bubble bath.

Never mind the fact that I don’t even knowwww the last time I took a bath. Never mind the fact that it was 58,492 degrees where my room and bathroom is. Never mind the fact that baths make me feel like I’m dying.

I was like, Self, we are sooooo doing this.

I gathered up a book, my computer for some tunes (couldn’t find my headphones), and my phone. Just in case. (bahaha).

If I was going to be “relaxing” I thought I’d set the mood, like they do in movies. I dimmed the lights in the bathroom and set my computer on the counter, far away from water with the soundtrack to The Holiday playing on my iTunes. If I woulda had candles, girrrrl, you know they woulda been lit. I went ALL out.

There I was, chillin’ in the bathtub with my vampire book and my computer started making noises. Skype noises. What. The. Fuck. Inappropriate!  My mother was calling. OF COURSE I DIDN’T ANSWER. Hello! I was in the BATHTUB.

So I reeeeeeached, awkwardly, to get my phone (careful not to drop it in the tub! That would have been dumb.) and called that bitch up on the phone. But then we got to talking and I was no longer relaxing and then I didn’t want to be talking to her while I was naked so I made us hang up.

Two: The Confession

Before tonight, I had never eaten KFC or watched a show called The Ladies of Demolition Derby.

Now I can finally cross those things off my bucket list!

Three: The Random Fact

I went looking on the interwebz for a prompt to write on my blog because I seemingly lacked the ability to open the cabinets full of thoughts in my brain. So, the prompt I was going to use was “What book could you read over and over again?” from Plinky. I had a good answer, too. I didn’t even have to think about it. I just knew immediately what book that would be.

I’ll tell you right now. The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky.

What I can tell you about this book is that it’s truly amazing. I have read it a number of times and I get something new from it every single time. It makes me cry and it hurts my heart and it makes the reader feel. It’s just… amazing.

Here are a few gems from the book:

so this is my life. and i want you to know that i am both happy and sad and i’m still trying to figure out how that could be.
*the perks of being a wallflower

when the police came, they found my brother asleep on the roof. nobody knows how he got there.
*the perks of being a wallflower

i really think that everyone should have watercolors, magnetic poetry, and a harmonica.
*the perks of being a wallflower

maybe these are my glory days, and i’m not even realizing it because they don’t involve a ball.
*the perks of being a wallflower

sam and patrick looked at me. and i looked at them. and i think they knew. not anything specific really. they just knew. and i think that’s all you can ever ask from a friend.
*the perks of being a wallflower

i am very interested and fascinated by how everyone loves each other, but no one really likes each other.
*the perks of being a wallflower

Read it. You’ll love it. I just know it!

xoxo

SO. GOOD.