Archive for April, 2011


So, I was playing with my webcam the other day and I was listening to *NSYNC’s I’ll Be Good For You from the No Strings Attached album.  Out of nowhere, I sneezed.  I watched it back and LOL’d to myself.  And then I singled out the sneeze and LOL’d again.

Then I wanted to just put it on twitter for my dear friend Alecia to see, but then I thought that since I don’t have a lot of time to post today (since the Tripod has reunited again and we have been off doing stupid things), I could just share this hilarity with everyone at once.

For you, I will.

I’ve finally done something cool.

For once in my life, I have engaged myself into a trend that is actually cool.

For once in my life, I have done something cool to my hair.

And putting sun-in in my hair in sixth grade with a girl from school and getting grounded for doing so does not count.

There’s this new craze that’s all about feather extensions.

I’ve been hearing about it for at least a couple months now and I finally decided to be brave and get some feathers stuck all up in my boring brown hair.  Now, I’m fine, fresh and fierce with my fancy flying feathers.  Oh em gee, that was probably one of my most successful almost-alliterations.  That was a fuck-ton of f’s up in that sentence.

Also, the birds in my backyard and I have something in common now, so that’s pretty sweet.  I’m sure it’s not long before I sprout some wings and fly far, far away from here.  I’ll fly all the way to Hogwarts and become friends with the post owls in the owlery and if Hogwarts won’t take me I can fall back on being a post-owl/weird flying girl with feathers in her hair.  Clearly I have my life all figured out.

Anyway, it took like three whole seconds for Wen to put the little metal bead/clipy-thing onto my hair and to seal it with the three feathers I picked.  Picking my feathers was the thing that took the most time.  In fact, I changed my mind like 4 times.  I was originally going to be a pansy-ass scaredy cat and get all brown tones but then I was like, wait, you should get a light colored one so it’ll at least show uppppp. But then I saw a black and white one and was like Dude, that is MINE.  And it was Wen who told me I needed to have the purple one because that way I have something fun, awesome and colorful but it’s not so overpowering and it still will blend in a little bit.

So, yeah, I ended up choosing a black and white feather, a two-tone brown one, and a purple and black one.  As you can (kinda) see here: I took a picture to show you how it’s clipped in my hair.  I should note that I got all three of my feathers clipped in the same metal clip thing, but Wen really tried to get me to put each feather in separately all over the place.  I was much too chicken-shit to actually do that, so I clipped them together in the same place, somewhere it would show when I pin my “bangs” back.  It goes in this metal bead type of thing, and it holds the feathers and a tiny, tiny section of hair and then gets tightened so it can’t move.

See?

You can hardly tell!

It’s super cool!

The other thing that’s cool about these feather extensions is that they’re supposedly super low maintenance.  I can wash my hair just like normal, and blowdry and flat iron the shit out of my hair like I normally do.  They curl right along with the rest of my hair, too; I tried it out today.  Wen and what’s-her-face who owns the salon I popped into today to have them done told me that they last for a really long time also.  The lady who owns the salon had two in and she’s been wearing them for six or seven weeks and they looked fab.  So, if and when I’m ready for them to come out, I’ll just pop back in and they’ll take my feathers out for me.

Except, fat chance because if I lose my feathers there goes my plan of flying away to Hogwarts and my future as a post-owl.

Here’s what they look like when I don’t do shit to my hair:

Ps. How awkward is this pic of me?! Lolz

Peach out, lovers.

This evening of Easter, I don’t have much to say.  It’s been a day full of family-time, and it’s been really nice.   I can’t say I’m really religious, but I counted today as a win the moment I stepped into church this morning and didn’t bust into flames.

With that said, I will leave you with this:

I didn’t have any pictures of bunnies or Jesus saved on my computer, so this’ll have to do.

I can also tell you this quick anecdote about a nerd-alert moment I had at the bar last weekend:

Me, to a man/boy I’d never met or seen before: IF HARRY POTTER WAS REAL, WHAT HOUSE WOULD YOU BE IN?!

Him: I FUCKING HATE HARRY POTTER!

Me, to Seneca: He’s probably in Slytherin.

Harry Potter Nerd Alert!! I’m in love and can’t get enough!!!

I made something in the kitchen today other than a small fire.

I know, you’re proud. I can hear your applause right now.

Now, this is something we usually only make in the fall, but, dude, I got home from work tonight and was like I NEED PUMKIN CAKE RIGHT NOW ASAP so I just fuckin’ did it. And let me tell you, it’s as good as I remember from November.

I didn’t think to take pictures while I was in the process of actually making it, but when I went to eat it, I decided it was too good to just hoard and not share with you.  So, here, my friends, is a delicious recipe for a lovely fall dessert.

(It just isn’t seasonally appropriate anymore, but whatevs, I still dig it.)

Ingredients:

  • 1 can Evaporated Milk
  • 3 Large Eggs
  • 1 ¼ tsp Cinnamon
  • ½ tsp Nutmeg*
  • ½ tsp Salt
  • 1 cup Sugar
  • 1 can Pumpkin (13 oz)
  • 1 pkg Yellow Cake Mix
  • ½ cup butter (softened/melted)
  • 1 carton Cool Whip (or other whipped topping)

Instructions:

  1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit
  2. Mix evaporated milk, eggs, cinnamon, nutmeg, salt, sugar, and pumpkin in a bowl.  Pour mixture into a greased and floured 9 x 13 pan.
  3. Mix cake mix with ½ cup melted butter.
  4. Crumble cake/butter mixture on top of pumpkin mixture.
  5. Bake at 350 for 40 minutes.
  6. Let cool.
  7. Serve with Cool Whip (or other whipped topping).
  8. ZOMG Yum!

Oh, heavens to Betsy, No! You MUST add the Cool Whip! It’s just not the same without it!!

Oh, yes, yes, yes!! That’s the ticket!!

Excuse me while I go enjoy my pumpkin cake!!

*”Oh, Meg, my little flower, my little bird, my little Nut Meg!”

Name that movie!!

Have a wonderful holiday weekend!!

Here is what I have learned about success:

It’s all about managing expectations.

For example, I try to go first whenever I can when giving presentations in class.  That way, no matter how ill-prepared I may be or how often I fumble over my words or even how lame my powerpoint presentation really is, there is no one to compare it to yet.  Going first allows the presenter to set the expectations for the rest of the presentations and is the one that the rest are measured against.

If I can help it, I never, ever go last.  Going last is simply not an option.  I’m not that much of a douche bag that I will email my professor ahead of time and insist on going first, but I definitely try to be that person that is like, “Oh, yeah, no big deal, I’ll go first if no one else wants to.” You know, all nonchalant.  And when someone else is like “Oh, I want to go first!” (because that always happens- there are always other freaks like me who want to set the bar low) I’m always like *Hulk’d up* NO I’M GOING FIRST, YOU IDIOT FUCK!

Just kidding, I don’t turn green, grow three times my regular size, or bust out of my white (??) shirt and purple pants.  I don’t even shout at my classmates. I simply keep it real and let everyone know what’s up: I must go first.

In life, I finally learned to be that kid at a birthday party to have her gift opened first.  There were far too many times I tried to be that girl whose present was so good it had to be saved for last. You know, that whole save the best for last bullshit.  But what parents don’t tell you and what you learn after birthday party after birthday party is that it sucks when someone else gives the same gift as you- or worse, someone gives a better present than yours.  That is a situation that takes you on a bullet train to Sucktown.

The best time to give your gift is first.  That way, you have the best gift of the day, even if it’s just for a moment.  That’s a moment you can’t get back. And, that way, if there is a duplicate gift situation, you don’t look like a dickhole and you don’t have to sit in the corner and cry because someone gave the same gift you did.  You can know that you have won. (Because winning is really all that matters- ask Charlie Sheen.)

At work, you have to manage expectations too. If you do something really impressive one day that is something that is expected to be repeated, you better believe that you have just set a precedent.  You will be held to that standard from now on.  That is totally fine if you don’t mind working your butt off to constantly exceed expectations and/or consistently perform at a high level.  But if you’re lazy as fuck and it was done on a fluke, then you’re pretty much up Chocolate Creek without a popsicle stick. If you’re lazy as fuck at work and really just want to do the least amount of work as possible, then you should never do anything more than what is expected of you. Because that is the kiss of death for you, and you can no longer be lazy as fuck.

I have finally realized that even dealing with some family drama, it all comes down to managing expectations.  Drew and I have tried (and failed at) the being-sneaky approach- that just ends in tears (including my own). We can’t just lie about our plans and spring them on a certain person at the last minute- a shitstorm of drama explodes out of seemingly nowhere.  We have also tried the let’s-be-really-vague-about-our-plans approach and that just ended in bitterness, shouting, resentment, anger, and, yes, you guessed it, tears (including my own).  Being vague has usually just resulted in having to lie (which we all know I am not good at) and/or just really awful family moments.

So, this time, we are trying the honesty-is-the-best-policy approach.  This approach includes telling both parties exactly what’s up and setting clear expectations for everyone involved. That way, when the time comes to leave, no one is surprised or upset.  I’m psyched about this.

Here’s hoping.

So, my friends, go forth and embrace this managing expectations lifestyle I have adopted.  Share with me your success stories. Or just stories about your childhood birthday parties. I would enjoy that as well.

We all know that I’m obsessed with my dog.

A few nights ago, Chiefy climbed up on my bed and we snuggled.

He’s not usually allowed on furniture and I don’t really like when he climbs on my bed because he gets his hair everywhere.  I don’t like that.

The thing is he’s just so damn cute that I can hardly resist.  And he’s a really good snuggler, so I have a hard time saying no.

Then this happened and I couldn’t even be mad that he was lying on my legs and I couldn’t move.

He was completely zonked out and it was seriously adorable.

I couldn’t bring myself to wake him so I did this instead:

Naturally, sniping a picture of his face was a better idea than waking the sleeping baby.

So, now, I’m gonna see if I can entice Chiefy into sleeping in my room tonight. He can even get his fur on my blankets. I’ll try not to hold it against him.

I thought I would share with you, my friends, just a few things I am obsessed with lately.  I usually throw in, like, one or two examples in any given post, but I don’t see why I can’t just put the major ones in one place for you. You know, in case you want to be exactly like me and like all the same things I do.  If that’s the case, then, DUDE, it’s your lucky day!!

Dance Music

I’m obsessed with my itunes playlist for when I workout.  I add to it constantly and spent a lotttt of time putting songs that put me in the zone into one place.  There is nothing worse than sweating your butt off to Ke$ha’s “Blow” for the song to end and segue into a slow jam like “Not Like the Movies” by Katy Perry. Don’t get me wrong- I LOVE Katy Perry, but I cannot keep my heart rate up if a song with less than, like, 120 beats per minute.  I got some ideas from searching online for fitness playlists, and Shape Magazine’s website proved to be pretty helpful.  Another thing I did was use my library’s website to find mix CDs of songs I like that were remixed for “the club”- which means that a techno-y beat was added and they’re usually sped up quite a bit.

S&M Remix

This gets its own bullet point because it’s just THAT good.  As you can see from above, I’m currently listening to Rihanna’s S&M Remix with Britney Spears. Oh. My. Gawd. I cannot get enough.  I listen to it on repeat and can’t stop.

You must purchase it on itunes.  Don’t illegally download that shit. I don’t believe in it (when it’s an artist I like).

Harry Potter

I am sure I have probably shared this with you before, but I am rereading all of the Harry Potter books.  And by “rereading” I mean “listening to them on CD because I’m too lazy to actually read and I enjoy listening to books in the car since my drive to work is 40+ minutes.”

I’m currently listening to Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.  Every single day, I listen and I just can’t believe how amazing these books are. Every single day, I am amazed by how much I had forgotten. Every single day, I get angry that so much is cut from the movies.  Every single day, I send angry text messages to Drew about that fact. Every single day, I try to work in Harry Potter vocabulary into my everyday lexicon.  For example, I used the following sentence today:

“Ohhh it makes me want to crucio the movie makers!”

See? I would totally unforgivable-curse the shit out of the powers that be in Hollywood that decided that the Harry Potter movies shouldn’t be like 8 hours long and shouldn’t include all the awesome little details I love about the books.  No big deal.  A lifetime in Azkaban for using an unforgivable curse? I guess since it would benefit the greater good, I could take the fall for that one.

Ron + Hermione = ❤

Yeah, I’m a huge nerd.

I don’t care what you think of me but I think that the two of them are just adorable. If you ‘ship anything other than Ron/Hermione and Harry/Ginny, you’re retarded and we can’t be friends.  I mean, go ahead and do whatever you want, but know there will be consequences.

They’re just too adorable for words.

Love love love!!

The Office

I’ve been watching it on DVD lately and hate myself for not getting into it when it first aired back when I was just a baby in high school. Okay, so that’s obviously the reason I never got into it. That and I tend to jump on board to things way after the fact. Oh well.  All that matters is that I’ve seen the light and love it now.

I just finished the fifth season on DVD and now have to wait forever and ever for my library to let me watch season six, since I’m, like, 16 or 16 holds. No big deal, I’ll just watch it in four months. I’m not mad.

I should also mention this: subset of this obsession can be my love of Jim and Pam on the show and just my general adoration of John Krasinski.  He is a chunk of nerd-alert, awkward-face-making, man-sass sexiness.

That Emily Blunt is one lucky bitch.

Mmmkay, guys.  There are five of several hundred obsessions that I have.  Please make a note of these and brush up on these things.  That way we will have lots to talk about and you can truly begin your mission of becoming just like me, because I know that’s what you’re working towards in life.

Oh, ps. I’m also in a really good mood right now because I just took my final for class and now the hell that I endured for the past seven weeks is officially behind me. Win. Win. Win. (#charliesheen #winning)

So, last Friday night, I stayed in and browsed Amazon for movies I wanted.

I know, a real wild night.

Tam and I had been discussing how badly we want to see the remake of Arthur, you know, the one with Russell Brand.  Yeah, it’s a remake of a hilarious yet old movie with Dudley Moore (RIP). She wants to see the remake because she loves the original and thought Dudley Moore was a cutie. I want to see the new one because I think Russell Brand is excellent.  And there’s a Harry Potter reference in the film, so I was pretty much sold based solely on that fact.

I bet you’re wondering what we purchased on Amazon.

Well, we got the original Arthur. For some reason, we no longer owned that movie.

$4.99! Can you believe that?! Sweet baby Jesus, I love Amazon.

And we also purchased Annie.

Can you believe I didn’t previously own Annie?! HOW COULD THAT BE?! SACRE BLEU!! MON DIEU!

Annie is pretty much the first musical, besides Grease, I learned in its entirety. In fact, I remember putting on “shows” with songs from Annie for my parents when I was a wee little one.

I mean, you guys know me; I quote Annie all the time.  There isn’t a week that goes by that “bet my bottom dollar” doesn’t sneak out of my lips.

Carol Burnett is a genius.

Well here’s the highlight of my day: the movies came in the mail today. Win.

Tam and I just watched Arthur and I was a gigglebox the whole time! Now, I have just begun watching Annie, and, while I am definitely enjoying myself, there is one thing by which I am perplexed.

Annie has what I would refer to as a mullet.  She’s got this weird ginger afro that oddly works. But then she’s got these weird, tiny braids that come off the bottom.  What’s that about?

I guess I’ll overlook the mullet and just pretend it’s not there.

What’s your favorite throwback movie? Do you have a thing for musicals like me?? I just don’t think there’s a musical I’ve met that I haven’t loved.

If you haven’t seen The American President we can’t be friends.

I love it.

Maybe too much.

Drew is home this evening so we get to watch it together. Be still, my heart.

Something about watching this movie with Drew just makes it so much better.  We can basically recite this movie in its entirety and it’s more fun to do it with him than by myself.

I keep remembering how often lines from this movie pop into my head on an everyday basis.

Let me explain:

1.)    One year in school I remember that effigy was a vocab word we were tested on.  We needed to know the definition and how to use it.  Luckily, the America President was created before I took that vocab quiz.  I totally knew what effigy meant because this movie helped me understand its use.

Sydney, seldom does a day go by when I am not burned in effigy.

2.)    Every time I drive by a Volvo dealership (like I did today) or any time I see a Volvo, all I can hear is Annette Benning’s voice lobbying her butt off for the GDC as Sydney Ellen Wade.

Katie, ten years from now any cars with an internal combustion engine is gonna be considered a collector’s item.  Come on board, we’ll make your Volvo a classic.

3.)    Any time I interact with or find myself frustrated with someone who is less than coherent or someone I deem an idiot, I frequently pawn this gem off as my own when talking about this person behind his or her back (because I’m a bitch like that).

Lewis, we’ve had presidents who were beloved and couldn’t find a coherent sentence with two hands and a flashlight.  People don’t drink the sand ‘cause they’re thirsty, Lewis. They drink the sand because they don’t know the difference.

Note: I usually embellish this phrase. For example, blah blah blah can’t find *something* with a compass, a map and a flashlight.

4.)    Generally, at the start of every week, I can hear Michael Douglas’ voice telling me it’s Monday morning.  Sometimes Drew and I even text each other the line from the movie just to share in the moment and reference what I can easily say is our favorite movie. The delivery is so perfect.

Lewis: You skipped a whole paragraph!
President Shepherd: And Monday morning it is.

5.)    The best speech in this whole movie is something I actually quoted in an academic paper in college, well, part of it at least. In fact, I used it in a paper I wrote to proclaim my love of Hillary Clinton actually. I so would.

Everybody knows America isn’t easy.  America is advanced citizenship.  You gotta want it bad, ‘cause it’s gonna put up a fight.  It’s gonna say “you want free speech? Let’s see you acknowledge a man whose words make your blood boil, who’s standing center stage and avocating, at the top of his lungs, that which you would spend a lifetime opposing at the top of yours.  You want to claim this land as the land of the free? Then the symbol of your country can’t just be a flag; the symbol has to be one of its citizens exercising his right to burn that flag in protest.” Show me that, defend that, celebrate that in your classrooms. Then you can stand up and sing about the land of the free.

6.)    The events in Lybia actually made me wonder if President Obama has seen this movie.  Talk about Life imitating Art.  Dude.  Just watch it and you’ll totally know what I’m talking about.  In my head, I imagine that Obama took a move out of the Andrew Shepherd playbook.

Sweet baby Jesus, this is such a great movie.

Like I said, if you haven’t seen it, we can’t be friends until you do.  And once you watch this (and love it, obviously) you need to then become obsessed with The West Wing and watch the entire series on DVD because it’s basically a giant continuation of the awesomeness that is The American President.

That is all.

Oh, no, wait. One more thing. I’m also obsessed with this.

Okay. For real this time.

That is all.

Until my class ends, you’re going to be experiencing really sub-par posts.  I just can’t seem to get a handle on my time-management.  For instance, while I got home today at an hour that allowed for plenty of time to achieve all of the things I needed to complete today, my time management was seriously lacking.

For instance, I meant to go to my gym this morning.  Instead, I slept in until 9:17 am and proceeded to take a thirty minute shower.  Why the hell!? What a waste of water.  And all I did was sing loudly and stand under the hot water until I decided, oh, yeah, maybe I should stop being a life-ruiner and wasting all of this water.   I mean, I didn’t even deep condition my hair, for goodness sake.  Sometimes I justify an excessively long shower by putting on a three-to-five minute conditioning treatment. Or sometimes, I justify it by shaving my legs.  I didn’t do either of those things today. Even though my legs are embarrassingly hairy right now.

Then, because my life is obviously a mess, I went to the doctor’s office to have my blood drawn for another appointment I have next week.  (Nothing major- don’t freak out.) The only thing is, my doctor is an hour away from where I live. Why is that, you might ask? Because I never have my shit together or all my ducks in a row enough to have all of my essential, necessary-for-life things all in one place.  That would be too easy.  So, I listened to Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (OH MY GAWD, IT’S SO GOOD! HOW COULD I NOT HAVE READ THIS BOOK AGAIN SINCE 2004- OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT?!) on CD for, like, 48 minutes because I had a moment of ADD while driving where it was seriously like, zomg I can’t focus on listening right now, I need to sing my face off to some Glee covers right now, in the middle of my trip back to O-Town, but after Pokerface (with the lovely Idina Menzel) I feel I can actively listen to Harry Potter again.

So, then, I panicked in the doctor’s office because I really don’t like needles and blood really freaks me out. (Do we not all remember my bloody nose?!) But, turns out, that procedure takes all of, like, 45 seconds to complete. So I was in and out of that office.

I managed to make it to the library before all 8 or 9 of my items expired and I was hit with some outrageous fees.  I also picked up a few items that were waiting for me (The Office, Season 4; Now that’s what I call Club Hits, and Total Club Hits 2). Before you even ask, I’ll tell you why I wanted some club hits.  It’s because I’ve been trying to perfect my fist-pump so I can rock the clubs like those hooligans from the Jersey Shore.  Bahahaha! No, actually, it’s because those CDs have songs I like that have been remixed to have higher beats per minute.  I’ve been trying to create a kick-ass workout playlist so I don’t want to die when I’m at the gym.

I stopped by the bank after that and transferred some funds for my Study Abroad trip, which I’m so excited for.  Have I told you all about that yet? No? Looks like that will have to come at a later date.

I did have a long, fun lunch with one member of the Tripod, which was glorious. But after that was done, I had to drive another hour back to where I actually live.  I listened to HP the whole way home this time.  I was in a bit of a food coma, so listening was really I was capable of doing anyway.

Next, I wandered around my school trying to locate the stupid Study Abroad office. It is like Narnia or something. I have looked and looked and looked on more than one occasion and I cannot find it.  It is obviously not at all like the Room of Requirement; otherwise it would have appeared to me on one of the few occasions I have been wandering around looking for it.  And don’t tell me to just ask someone, because I totally have.  The yahoos at the information desk either don’t know where it is either or they just don’t know how to effectively communicate to me where the location of the office is.  And the office where I ended up today seemed confounded and didn’t even know where it was or how to explain how to find it to me.  Some lady told me to go to the other end of the building and that Alex’s office was on the left. The left of what?! I walked to the other end of the building and looked like an idiot, wandering around trying to find an office that will not reveal itself to me.

Sucktown, population: me.

Instead, I snuck into my mom’s office, stole one of her envelopes, wrote Alex (the study abroad advisor I have been in contact with) on the envelope along with my name and student number, sealed my first payment check inside and called it good. I told those yahoos at the information desk to just put it in his mailbox.

Then I came home, and that’s where time got away from me.  One minute I was listening to my club hits and then I got a text message about a theme day at work tomorrow, Major League Baseball.  I don’t even know what that means.  I guessed that that meant I should wear something to do with the Detroit Tigers because that’s baseball.  But then I realized I, of course, do not own anything that is Tigers- related, and I won’t just not participate in theme days. I love theme days! So you can bet your bottom dollar I went out and bought a Tigers shirt that was somewhat cute- and it was 25% off to boot!

But, because we live in the middle of BFE, it takes like 40 minutes to get anywhere. So that was a giant waste of time- except for the fact that I got to listen to Harry Potter again so it wasn’t that big of a waste.

I stumbled upon a website called Tastefully Offensive, and that was a giant time-suck.  I just kept watching video after video and giggling to myself on the couch.  I had every intention of editing a group project paper, but that didn’t start until about 8 o’clock, and it was much bigger of a task than I had originally thought. So now, I’m writing this post at the last possible second and it’s all about crap you don’t care about. And my contacts are starting to stick to my eyes and I really just want to be in my bed watching Twilight or The Office or something.

So, yeah.

kaythanksloveyougoodnightbye!