Tag Archive: CNN


I was doing some reading today that made me wonder something. Obviously. Since I wonder things like every moment I’m awake.

Here’s where you assume I was reading something reputable, like a book or the New York Times or CNN.com or something else informative. This is the part where you attribute intelligent things to my person.

But, alas, this is the part where I tell you that I was reading nothing of the sort.

I was reading textsfromlastnight.com.

I came across this gem:

(443): and I’m pretty sure he drank the lava lamp

I used to have a lava lamp. I wonder what happened to it?

Upon reading this, I went to my trusty friend, who would never judge me for asking a silly question.

I interrupted our bitch-fest to pose my question.

Me: Is there real lava in lava lamps?

Seneca: Kathryn Grace!

Me: Was that really dumb?

Seneca: How about we just never talk about that ever

Then we had a good laugh.

If I had any sense of pride or shame, I wouldn’t have wanted to share that stroke of genius (?) with you.

Advertisements

I’m taking a breather from figuring out the net present value of stuff for my finance homework and listening to the State of the Union as background noise.

I want to just point out that something happened to Obama on my TV.

While Joe Biden looks all normal and pink, almost like a baby, and the speaker of the house (whoever that is- I’m a terrible, uninformed citizen. And it certainly doesn’t help that I’ve been living in a hole in the ground, watching only Veronica Mars on DVD) looks nicely tanned and has a good, healthy glow about him, President Obama looks… jaundice.

First, I thought he looked yellow, like an Oompa Loompa, because I was watching Fox. (I had been watching a Glee rerun, “Furt,” to be specific.) So I switched to CNN. Still really yellow.

The weird thing is his hands look like a normal skin color, his normal skin color. So I know that it’s something about his face.

My guess is that The Man is trying to make him more white.

Obviously, they’re not doing a very good job.

Seriously, the jig is up.

Anyway, I enjoy listening to Obama talk. I’m not really sure I could tell you what he talked about in this State of the Union, but his enunciation is like a dream. The inflection he uses when he speaks is like a song. I’d like his speech pattern on Facebook if I could. I’d like it like Lionel Richie, all night long.

On a somewhat related note, Seneca and I had a brief discussion of stupid rules within the English language. She mentioned that the “I” before “E” except after “C” rule is stupid and false.

I told her, “I think the I before E thing is bull.”

Seneca basically agreed, “It’s an attempt to make English less ridiculous, and it fails.”

So then, because I’m succinct and can think of more than one thing at a time, I essentially ended our conversation with the following awesomeness: “English just… sucks, much like America, where all of these rules exist but there are always a bunch of loopholes.”

See why it’s related??? President Obama, State of the Union, America…?

Genius.